The harsh reality
of the current society in India is that marriage is still considered to be the
‘be all and end all’ goal of anyone’s life. Everything we do as teens, and
adults is to one day be an eligible bachelor or spinster. Because of the
pedestal that we have placed the institution of marriage on, it is hard for us
to accept that any relationship, legally binding or not, can be flawed. Marriage
counseling
as a concept is still frowned upon in most of the today’s Indian society. So
much so that people continue to be in toxic marriages because even thinking
about separation is blasphemous. However, sooner rather than later, people will
have to understand that whenever two individuals are involved, conflicts are
bound to happen. Those conflicts go up a few notches when one of the people, or
both, have deep underlying issues of their own. And they never really worked on
them because the society made them believe that marriage fixes everything,
including them.
No matter how
grave a problem someone might be going through, they are always made to believe
that getting married is the ultimate solution. However, that is as far as
anything can get from the truth. Your issues do not just disappear once you are
married. In fact, they surface every now and then just because of the dynamic
that you are in now. Mental health
counseling
for people suffering from an issue is extremely important and no relationship
can ever substitute it. We need to recognised that mental health issues are
just as important and pressing as a physical health issue. If you break your
leg, arm, and ankle, you will postpone your wedding, right? Then why go ahead
with it if you realise that you are suffering from depression or anxiety or any
other form of mental illness? The best way forward is to gather yourself, keep
your loved ones around you and seek therapy. Remember, there are no substitutions
for therapy.
Another reason for
this archaic overarching thought process is the apprehension towards therapy in
general. The Indian society has still not come to terms with the fact that
people need help to function properly, and that not everything is about getting
physically hurt. Trauma can stun you, paralysis you and stunt your growth as an
individual. But the narrative, at least in urban India, is on an upturn.
Therapy methods like group counseling is a lot more
commonplace and readily accessible than they were a few years ago. What this
does is that it allows people to accept that they have an issue, because a cure
is just around the corner. They do not have to hide their mental illness to fit
in. The hope here is that soon, the majority of the Indian society will realise
this and stop believing that marriage can fix everything. Let us hope that day
comes sooner rather than later.
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